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Bloganuary #9: Why Do People Think I Have Low Self-Esteem?

This question is easy. When I was young, and probably still do, I tended to underrate myself. There are several reasons for doing this.

  • I’m realistic in my assessment of myself.
  • I’m trying to be funny and laugh at my paltry efforts.
  • I’m trying to be humble and modest like my parents taught me.
  • I’m trying to guard my poor ego when someone else underrates me.

It strikes me as funny when I have known people for a while, and they tell me how much I have improved at xyz and how much more confidence I have. Did I really change that much? Was I that awful, diminutive, or incapable when they first met me? Have I really improved or do they just like me now?

Ms. Wiseacre posed for my iPhone.

Evaluating My Time Commitment for Bloganuary

Now I have a question. I took a break from Bloganuary yesterday after reading Alegria’s post about how self-centric the prompts are. I agree that they are self-centric and therefore easy to write about. However, I haven’t found them objectionable or overly invasive. In fact, if I were still a professional developer, I would write down the questions to use as icebreakers for my sessions. However, I waivered in my commitment to participate based on her post, and my decision to do something else with my time yesterday.

I conducted a test to see if I was the only one of my regular blogging group who was participating in Bloganuary. After looking around at a few friends’ blogs, I couldn’t find many Bloganuary posts. Most of my blogging friends are established bloggers, so they don’t really need practice in blogging every day, and they have their routines established already. However, after reading several posts before Bloganuary, I thought there would be more people I knew participating. So, I stuck in my oar. Now I’m wondering …

Even member of a group, not the leaders usually have some expectation of everyone participating in a group activity after it’s been discussed. I picture teen movies in which the cool kids in the group get a bunch of groupies excited to do something and then drop out at the last minute leaving the not-cool members of the group exposed. It’s pretty funny in a movie.

One year, a million years ago, our pastor’s wife decided we should perform a play and that I should be the villain. I didn’t want to 1. be in any play, and 2. play the part of a villain. About a week and a half into practice, our director decided to take a trip and leave me, the assistant pastor’s wife with no acting experience or ability, in charge of the play. The play faltered and died under my leadership and was completely dismantled by the time she got back weeks later. She was shocked and angry at me. She thought I should have honored my (coerced) commitment. I felt she had betrayed hers and refused to feel guilty about it.

Nobody coerced me to participate in Bloganuary. Even though, I’m busy, I thought I’d give it a try. If you are reading my posts AND participating in Bloganuary, put a link to your most recent post in my comment section, so I can visit you.

If you agree with Alegria, and don’t like the prompts, tell me that, too. Maybe these prompts are causing me to become too self-centric on my blog, and blogging is so much more than that! What do you think? Right now, I am choosing to respond and putting off getting some much-needed exercise because I posted the widget in my sidebar and made a commitment.

I look forward to hearing what you think.

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#Bloganuary #blogprompt

67 replies »

  1. Marsha, I am not a writer at all and as Lily I’d rather post a photo or two to tell my story. If I like the prompt I’ll take part, if not I’ll skip it. I like your posts and get to know you better, I always say if you don’t want to read a post skip it! I’m an introvert by nature but love to be around people. Keep up your good blog!!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This was an interesting topic to read, Marsha, and I know firsthand that you cannot be categorized as someone with low self-esteem. We all have doubts about our abilities all through our lives, but some of us like me just talk out loud more about it, LOL! I mentioned Sunday about what to tell my teenaged self and the confidence I got midway through high school. After constant teasing (I don’t classify it as bullying) for having bright red hair, then adding the train tracks on my teet for 2 years in junior high (worst time of life ever for most of us), I became more resilient and subconsciously aimed to excel in sports, art, and academics. I was very introverted but let my actions do the talking. I fought for my self-esteem as many of us did. I think we all underrate ourselves to a degree and end up expressing ourselves through well, blogging, and other creative outlets!

    On another note, I had hoped Bloganuary was going to be more like the original WP challenges where we could engage with a particular community but I still don’t see how that is working. I hope when I can and double-dip it with my Sunday Stills themes. The good thing as bloggers we have a choice!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. It would be a real challenge for me to commit to a daily blog post. I do post six days a week on Facebook and Twitter, but those are simply photographs with a weekly theme. I would really struggle to generate a daily post, even for only a month.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Marsha, I was not aware of the challenge, but from your description, it doesn’t sound like something that would interest me. Posting every day seems burdensome on both the blogger and readers. I get personal on my blog, and I don’t mind sharing like that. I think it makes for a better blogging community when we get to know each other. But, the subject matter is by choice, not according to a prompt. This challenge sounds more like journal writing 101, or ice breaker activities. I am in the camp of ‘write what you want.’ It’s your blog.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Since we didn’t know the topics before we made the commitment, I think it negates the commitment. The first couple were fun, but there is nowhere to link your posts to that I can see, so how do you expand your community? It is almost contradictive to blogging to have the assignment come by email. It doesn’t build community.

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  5. I’m so sorry Marsha to have had any part in breaking your writing streak. That was never my intention. I simply wrote as I felt and did not expect to influence anyone to act in any particular way. You must absolutely do what’s right for you.

    Liked by 1 person

        • I’m not sure they are. For a different reason. Blogs like mine are somewhat self-centric, though I reach out through different challenges to support other bloggers. However, if your reason to participate is to make friends and get acquainted, then why are the posts coming from an email and not a blog where you can link up with people?

          Liked by 1 person

          • I’m not sure what you mean about where my posts are coming from. They should be coming from my blog. I’m not really understanding. How can posts be coming from an email when we’re all posting on our blogs? Isn’t it about how the subscriber signs up? Via email or as a WP follow?

            And to assume I don’t want to connect with people is a bit presumptuous. I have no idea what’s going on here, but I wish you’d explain. Are you angry at me because of my posts? Or…? I’m really confused about the turn you’ve taken in your tone towards me. Or am I misunderstanding something?

            Liked by 1 person

          • Alegria, you are misunderstanding. I am not mad at you. Every day there is an email that tells us the topic for the day. It is not coming to me through a blog. Are you seeing a universal blog post that tells the topic and invites everyone to link? That has nothing to do with you, but with the author of the challenge itself. I’m sorry you took offense. None was meant. I did not mean where YOUR blog posts are coming from but the author of the challenge. Does that make sense. I host several challenges, and people who respond with a post link to my post. I visit their blog and see what they posted. Other people read the comments on my challenge and may click to read someone else’s post because they saw it in my comment section. That is what kind of interaction I’m talking about. Again, nothing to do with you personally.

            Liked by 1 person

          • Omg I’m sorry Marsha. I’m such a ditz!!! Thank you for clearing that up. I was so confused. And I’m so sorry I took that personally. Now that I reread your previous comment, it makes sense. I’m going to blame this on the fever. 😂 No actually, I’m the ditz!

            And yes, I see what you mean. Yes, I get an email every evening. You’re right, I guess the pros at WP haven’t figured out how to run a challenge like the rest of you veterans have.

            Again, my sincerest apologies for running away with that the way I did. I thought you and I had a really nice connection. Thank you for you patience with this very ditzy woman Marsha. 🙏💕

            Liked by 1 person

          • No worries, Alegria. We do have a really nice connection, and if nothing else comes out of Bloganuary, our connection is worth the entire month. Meanwhile, you got quite a few people commenting, which is a good thing. 🙂 I really don’t know why they didn’t just establish a WP blog and run this event through the blog. They should have asked me.

            Liked by 1 person

    • I’ m not sure it’s promotional in nature. Of course we had no idea of what the prompts would be until they appeared. Self-centric seems more about self, though than a topic. I like how you consider your purpose and weigh the importance of your time.

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  6. What we blog about and what prompts we use, if any, is a personal decision, so if Bloganuary interests you I’d say go for it! But I’m not participating, for several reasons. Firstly, I do enough challenges already and I’m not looking for more. But secondly, if I were, I prefer photo challenges to writing ones, and when I do write I prefer to stick to my core theme of travel, which the Bloganuary prompts don’t really link to.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Marsha, I must admit I’ve only learned about Bloganuary through your posts! I enjoy learning more about you and here about your clear insight into yourself and your interaction with others.

    Personally, I would struggle with daily posts – it is hard to keep up with posting once a week! 😀 However as a reader I find them rewarding for popping in now and then. In my early days of blogging I would try and comment on every single daily post but with time accepted this wasn’t possible for me and instead catch up.

    I like your new watch and enjoy keeping up with the Fitbit and all the exercise! 😀

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you, Annika. It is a bit much to write one every day, but more than that to read other people’s posts every day. I am not seeing a way to do that easily, but that is probably just me. Thank you so much for taking the time to read and comment. I enjoyed getting to know you better through your interview with Yvette. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  8. I think it’s important to do what works for you. It’s your choice. Who knows why others think the way they do? Their thoughts should have no impact on you. (Except I hope mine do. 😉😅)

    Liked by 1 person

  9. I would have participated but I was already committed to Linda’s JudJoJan challenge. It’s a month long challenge for January too. Though these prompts seem to be easy to respond to and interesting.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I still consider myself somewhat of a newbie in blogging (2 yrs) and at first it sounded fun and I thought I read that it could anything as long as it was one post per day. Maybe I read/understood it wrong. But the questions came and was okay, but I got all tuckered out by day #4 (I’m naturally shy, introvert, private person) so I was like ..nah, ugh, too much information on me. I’m tired. So I stopped. 🙂 I prefer posting just photos and the odd time flash fiction for fun. The people on here are super nice and so understanding.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Lily, thank you for your thoughtful response. I used to be shy as well. Life has cured me of that. I am still a natural introvert, but most people would argue with me. LOL. This is my tenth year of what started out as an experiment. Some things have been more successful for me than others. I never liked the awards, though I participated in them to get acquainted. Most of those people have disappeared from my blogging life. Photo and writing challenges, interviews, and hosting an event called Story Chat (like an online book chat) is how I spend my time now. Where do you post your flash fiction? Do you participate in the Carrot Ranch Flash Fiction?

      Liked by 1 person

      • Thank you Marsha. I’m a little better but still quite shy so every time I post a writing prompt I go..okay here it goes! lol 🙂 I’ve written in ~M’s, Putting My Feet in the Dirt writing prompts here and there, and I just tried SoSC just this past week. And Ronovan Writes a few times as well as RDP, and First Line Friday. I haven’t seen that one yet! Story Chat and Carrot Ranch Flash Fiction, I would like to check out for sure.

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  11. I read the self-centric comment and was not bothered one bit. I like activities like Bloganuary because it gets me excited to open my computer each day. It’s like meeting a whole bunch of new people who share something in common with me. Ok, it’s selfish. I need friends, therefore I blog.

    Liked by 2 people

  12. I don’t normally participate in these prompts, and certainly not a daily one. I write when I’m inspired. As a blog reader, I really have no interest in reading daily posts (and multi-day) from one person. My email box is full enough as it is. I find myself reading a couple a week and deleting the rest. But, I can also understand why someone would be attracted to the prompts… whatever floats your boat, as Cindy said.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thanks for that honest answer, Janis. I don’t like to read multiple posts from one person, unless it’s Cee. Then I will. I also enjoy Becky B’s Square’s challenge, although I admit that it’s difficult to post anything every day. I’m exhausted at the end of the month. Having my own challenges, I don’t want to participate in something that detracts people from those because I spend a lot of time and energy composing them. The last thing I want to do is push people away! Have a wonderful January, Janis, with or without Bloganuary. BTW, are you still interested in writing a short story for Story Chat. It seems like we talked about it a few months back. I have one month left for this Story Chat year. That is September.

      Liked by 1 person

      • I don’t think many of us understood when we started blogging, how time-consuming it can be. It’s a labor of love, for sure… but there is a lot of work 🙂 I may participate in Story Chat but I never know when I’ll be inspired to write something. If I have something and September is available, great. If not, I can wait until a new opening appears.

        Liked by 1 person

  13. I say whatever floats your boat and as the saying goes.. you can’t please all of the people all of the time. Love the opportunity for bloggers to share.
    And good for you to leave mid way through.. You can always quit here to while you’re ahead.. lol 🤣
    As for me, I’d a quite the first day with time and hey it is once a day as opposed to the 10 posts i see by one person, so there’s that. 💖

    Liked by 2 people

      • Welcome and digging out thanks for asking.. the question is.. to booster tomorrow or not. debating on canceling.🤷‍♀️💖.. after your post i thought I’d check them out and give a like to new bloggers but oh my, there are so many I couldn’t get through them.. lol 🤣🤣🤣🤣

        Liked by 2 people

        • It does take a lot of time. I don’t get to all of mine. If they have a blog name that is in the least commercial, I give them a pass. I usually just do likes for one blog, and that takes so long that I don’t do it again for a while. It does get me to some new faces, though and I like that. Believe it or not, I used to keep track of all of the people I visited on a spread sheet. That is a great way to get started, but it is so time consuming.

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Marsha

Marsha

Hi, I'm Marsha Ingrao, a retired educator and wife of a retired realtor. My all-consuming hobby is blogging and it has changed my life. My friends live all over the world. In November 2020, we sold everything and retired to the mile-high desert of Prescott, AZ. We live less than five miles from the Granite Dells, four lakes, and hundreds of trails with our dog, Kalev, and two cats, Moji and Nutter Butter. Vince's sister came with us and lives close by. Every day is a new adventure.

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