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#WQWWC #9: Trustworthiness @ColleenChesebro, @ReflectionsWalk

Welcome back to Writer’s Quotes Wednesdays Writing Challenge.

It’s simple to join in! Find quotes (as many or as few as you want), your choice of response. If you want to participate, write a post, create a pingback to link your post. Not sure how to do that? See how to create pingbacks here

Flex your creative muscles and share what you think about the topic of the week using a quote from a favorite author.

The Topic This Week

This week’s topic for #WQWWC is trustworthiness, trustworthy or trust.  

Trust seems to be in high demand and low supply in some arenas of life today. But how valuable is trustworthiness?

“The glue that holds all relationships together … is trust, and trust is based on integrity.”

Brian Tracy

Integrity means the quality or practice of being honest. 

In my mother’s preschool class a little boy took another toddler’s sunglasses and paraded around the room with them on. When Mom caught him, he cried and blamed a little girl across the room as he maintained tight possession of the sunglasses. 

Blame creates distrust.

“Our distrust is very expensive.”

Ralph Waldo Emerson

How to Build a Community with Trust

“A society that relies on generalized reciprocity is more efficient than a distrustful society, for the same reason that money is more efficient than barter. Trust lubricates social life. Networks of civic engagement also facilitate coordination and communication and amplify information about the trustworthiness of other individuals.”

Robert D. Putnam

Tulare County Office of Education(TCOE) teaches character and recognizes in children across the county for qualities like trustworthiness. Our leaders supported teachers with the program Character Counts so that students would learn the Six Pillars of Character that will make them good citizens and leaders when they grow up.

Until our department at TCOE studied The Speed of Trust by Stephen Covey, I had never associated trust with economics and speed. It made sense though when I considered how easy it is to get something done when there is trust in the relationship.

One of the reasons that moving from Woodlake was so hard for me was the economics of trust that I enjoyed because I was part of a trustworthy organization. Getting things done for Kiwanis was simple. Sometimes we signed paperwork. Sometimes the city did the paperwork for us. Sometimes we paid a fee, but most of the time it was waived. 

Kiwanis had built up trust with the city and it followed all of the members because of the years of honesty and follow through initiated by a few individuals. 

Groups that did not have that degree of trust developed, got little done and had a hard time attracting members.  

When I took an active role in Kiwanis, I felt my personal competence in trustworthiness grow. Kiwanians were known to always go the extra mile, therefore my personal level of trust with others in that community grew exponentially when I did business in their name. 

How to Grow Self-Trust

“Whoever is careless with the truth in small matters cannot be trusted in important affairs.”

Albert Einstein

My parents tried to build trustworthiness in my brother and me by assigning chores. One of my chores at age seven was emptying and burning the trash in the large oil drum in the backyard. (Showing my age here!) At least I thought burning was part of my responsibility. The trash barrel was humongous and I wasn’t, so I remember it being a difficult chore, but I loved the burning part. I remember my parents taking that chore off my list when the fire got out of hand one night. 

The trash was not the only thing that burned that night. My self-trustworthiness went down a notch as well. What I learned was that if I botched the job, I probably would not have to do that one again or possibly would face some kind of punishment for not completing the assignment successfully. 

During my school years I developed the habit of excusing myself. Forgot my homework, Mom will bring it. Don’t want to speak in front of the class – play sick. Don’t want to do an assignment – wait till the last minute. It’s no wonder that I had very little self-esteem. I wasn’t building self-trust.

One way to build self-trust and reputation for trustworthiness is through participation in church, family, job, community service organizations, sports, local theatre, or musical groups. Being part of a group holds us responsible and develops character. But developing self-trust goes deeper than keeping good company.

“The process of building trust is an interesting one, but it begins with yourself, with what I call self trust, and with your own credibility, your own trustworthiness. If you think about it, it’s hard to establish trust with others if you can’t trust yourself.

Stephen Covey

Trustworthiness is important at every level, as Stephen Covey points out. My husband and I vowed to walk 35,000 steps a week when we moved to Prescott. No one is checking up on us. This week we are not doing it because of the snow. It is going to be hard to make it up, it’s much easier to let it slide. If we want to increase our self-trust we will find a way to get those steps in or make it up later. If we do it, we will feel good about ourselves. And we will get in shape – a side benefit. 

Being trustworthy is hard work for me. I have a post that I have to get out for Wednesday, January 27th. You are going to hold me accountable because the name of the challenge has the weekday built in it. 

So what is trustworthiness to you? 

Here are some other quotes I found that I wanted to share. There are hundreds of others that may inspire you. 

“When we feel unsafe with someone and still stay with him (or her), we damage our ability to discern trustworthiness in those we will meet in the future.”

David Richo

“Women in my focus groups, they say a bald man is trustworthy. He has nothing to hide. “

Kellyanne Conway

“Your faithfulness makes you trustworthy to God.”

Edwin Louis Cole

“People crave trustworthy information about the world we live in. Some people want it because it is essential to the way they make a living. Some want it because they regard being well-informed as a condition of good citizenship. Some want it because they want something to exchange over dinner tables and water coolers.”

Bill Keller

I look forward to reading what you have to say on the subject. Talk to me! 

Check This Out

Changes by Frank

35 replies »

  1. Trust … hmmmm …. An interesting word. You know who many say, “Don’t tell them I told you, but …. ” … I stop them then say, “Then don’t tell me.”They were told something in trust, so they should keep it that way. On the flip side, I’ve been burned by that enough times that I’m am very careful what I share with others. PLUS, as a listener, I assume the teller does not want me to say anything (as opposed to the opposite view). Yep – I’m very mum! Meanwhile, thanks for the pingback … and I am working on my hosting post. 🙂 … and I enjoyed your interview with Jo yesterday.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Thanks, Frank, I loved the interview, too. She’s a wonderful person. You make some good points about trust.

      As a former pastor’s wife I was in the situation of being a listener often. It is a hard place to be especially in a small town where everyone talks to everyone and nobody remembers what they’ve told to whom in secret! You might hear the same secret come out of someone else’s mouth. It was crazy-making.

      Someone could write an entire blog about gossip – of right – people do. By the time secrets hit the press – I don’t know – is it still gossip, or is it criminal behavior or lies, slander? It’s definitely not mum. Besides, some things you were told as a teacher, you had to follow up on as a mandated reporter. One of my fourth graders told me that her uncle was molesting her. Of course, you don’t keep mum, then. It turned out that was why she was in the US where she was safe, and her uncle was in Mexico.

      You got me wound up here Frank! LOL I look forward to your post. 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

  2. What a brilliant piece, Marsha. I’m still trying to get everything in place for our healthcare. Working with the VA and military is always so time-consuming. Loved the quotes and your experiences. I’ll try to jump in this week. HUGE hugs for the work you do. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Reblogged this on Cecilyswritings and commented:
    Sometimes I use a word as a theme on my FB Page for quotes that I post. This evening my quote was about trust, and strange enough I found this piece in my newsfeed. Many of the quotes here I’ve used – what a great post. Trustworthiness.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Trustworthiness… a big theme indeed, Marsha. Sadly, the situation we found ourselves in as I mentioned to you was that my BIL’s roommate has various medical and psychological issues, making her very untrustworthy. So much so, I would not leave my dogs alone in the house with her even for a little while, afraid she would lock them out of the house in the front yard to spite me! Her behavior and reputation were enough to drive us out into our RV as we wait for the house to be finished! I loved to read about your relationship with Kiwanis and Woodlake. I can see why you miss it all. I do miss my years at Sacramento State where I earned respect and shared mutual trust among faculty, staff and students. Good for you and Vince getting your steps in. Be careful in that snow but enjoy the winter weather!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Terri, that sounds like a very trying situation. I can’t imagine how your BIL puts up with it. You were smart to get out of there right away. People like that scare me, but to have them living with me would be unbearable. How is your BIL handling the situation? I’m glad you are doing ok. I know you are missing Sac State. Any news on the new job possibility? I do miss Kiwanis, but they are writing a grant right now for the Garden. I have helped a tiny bit, but it is awesome that someone else has taken on the initiative to write and submit it. Our VP has stepped in and is doing an amazing job keeping the ball rolling with hosting the Zoom meetings(WB the president’s job), writing up a summary, keeping attendance (WB my job) and writing this grant (WB my job probably) Anyway, it doesn’t “feel” much different since we are meeting by Zoom and by email other than I’m not helping out in the Garden. You take care. Much love to you both.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Excellent post, Marsha. The burning out of hand bit made me grin, though rather sad you got demoted as a result. I was over-the-top with chores, wanted to do absolutely everything. I was just as intense in school, but eventually I met with a kind of burn-out, and deadlines suddenly became an anguished struggle to meet. I still battle that and can see how much that eroded my sense of self-trust. Wonderful quotes and thoughts, Marsha. Thoroughly enjoyed it. Cheers- toad

    P.S. Loving the snow pics. How are those electro-sox working out??? 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    • I haven’t received the electric socks yet! I was just thinking I need to find out what’s going on with them. I think I gave you the wrong impression if you thought I was intense in school. I was in college, and a little bit in high school. Before that I was not a scholar other than a good reader. Now I find that it takes me longer and I often reread a post based on what others said that I missed in the post. So happy for your “smiling” comment. Talk to you soon, Autty. Hi to Sir. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • Oops sorry, I meant I was as intense with school life as I was with my personal responsibilities at home/chores/personal goals, etc. I didn’t mean I was as intense as you were- I get the sense you were pretty balanced, not intense at all. I’m still working on achieving that balance. Bit by bit 😉 Cheers- smiling

        Liked by 1 person

        • haha I don’t know that I’m balanced. I always think I am until someone sets me straight, but I was mostly lazy and thought I was too smart to need to study. LOL Joke was on me!

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Marsha

Marsha

Hi, I'm Marsha Ingrao, a retired educator and wife of a retired realtor. My all-consuming hobby is blogging and it has changed my life. My friends live all over the world. In November 2020, we sold everything and retired to the mile-high desert of Prescott, AZ. We live less than five miles from the Granite Dells, four lakes, and hundreds of trails with our dog, Kalev, and two cats, Moji and Nutter Butter. Vince's sister came with us and lives close by. Every day is a new adventure.

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