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Things that are Rough

My friend Marvin Awbrey died. I loved him dearly. He was such a close friend that I could criticize him when we disagreed, but don’t you dare unless you loved him too!

By this time, I had learned to bring folks where I want them, not take a snapshot! I learn SO slowly! :)
Marvin, Father of History Day in CA, presents the Marvin Awbrey award to a student in Tulare County.

He was my mentor. He taught me how to be a history consultant. He dedicated himself to all educational organizations especially history. He sent me tons and tons of picture and story emails that I was supposed to pass on. I seldom did, but they showed me that I was on his list. He loved me and thought about me every time someone sent him a chain  email.

Stupid
This is difficult for me, Marvin.

Marvin’s last few years were rough, but he did not complain.

His good friend and sometimes caretaker, Linda Boaen, said,

“It is a testament to my best friend Marvin Awbrey what a great person he was. We can all take lessons from his dignity. He let those he loved know it. He never ever complained through kidney transplant. Three bouts of cancer and all the treatments that go with it. Massive surgeries that would devastate most. He kept extremely busy with causes he believed in. He gave to all charities. And he forgave those who trespassed against him. He loved my children, David and my pets. He was a kind caring human that most will never encounter. I hope he knows how much we miss him.”

Marvin Awbrey
Marvin Awbrey

I will miss Marvin a great deal. We always went out for his birthday. He turned 78 on January 14th. I emailed him asking when we could go out for his birthday. He didn’t return the email. Sometimes people don’t. I emailed him about something else, and he didn’t respond to that either. Sometimes people don’t. I rarely called him. Cancer took his voice box. I called him and left a message. He didn’t call back. Sometimes people don’t.

My last picture of Marvin
My last picture of Marvin

He sent me and six others an email on January 13th. I finally emailed him back 22 hours before I heard that he was gone. It was about going to the doctor.

Marvin's last email

On the 23rd of January he sent his last email along with a personal message.

train of life
At birth we boarded the train and met our parents,
and we believe they will always travel on our side.
 
However, at some station
our parents will step down from the train,
leaving us on this journey alone.
 
As time goes by,
other people will board the train;
and they will be significant
i.e. our siblings, friends, children,
and even the love of your life.
 
Many will step down
and leave a permanent vacuum.
 
Others will go so unnoticed
sothat we don’t realize
they vacated their seats.
 
This train ride will be full of joy,
sorrow, fantasy, expectations,
hellos, goodbyes, and farewells.
 
Success consists of having a good relationship
with all passengers
requiring that we give the best of ourselves.
 
The mystery to everyone is:
We do not know at which station
we ourselves will step down.
 
So, we must live in the best way,
love, forgive, and offer the best of who we are.
 
It is important to do
this because when the time comes for us to step down
and leave our seat empty
we should leave behind beautiful memories
for those who will continue to travel on the train of life.
 
I wish you a joyful journey on the train of life.
Reap success and give lots of love.
More importantly, thank God for the journey.
 
Lastly, I thank you
for being one of the passengers on my train.
 
(By the way, I am not planning to get off the train anytime soon
but if I do, just remember I am glad you were part of my journey.)

“Marsha happy new year dear friend!   Can you forward the particulars for the SJCCSS Alcatraz visit?  Can it be done in one day? I could use the minutes from the Reedley  meeting, too.   When is out meeting this month and where is it?   I am feeling unconnected to SJVCSS and I don’t like that.    Thanks, Marvin”

I replied back 11 hours later, and he didn’t write back. Sometimes people don’t. That’s rough!

I am blessed to have been his friend. I will miss him. I had fun with Marvin. This is rough.

For more things that are rough, Click here.

CFFC runs weekly challenge starting every Tuesday.
CFFC runs weekly challenge starting every Tuesday.
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20 replies »

  1. So sorry for your loss. I too have an elderly friend who was my mentor when I first started teaching- I’ve written about him a bit in my blog- M. Jerry Weiss. He lost his wife 2 years ago and I try to see him about once a month. It’s hard- he’s lonely and by 88 so many of his friends are gone or too invalid to what they used to do. I try to help but am busy with my own parents!

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Marsha

Marsha

Hi, I'm Marsha Ingrao, a retired educator and wife of a retired realtor. My all-consuming hobby is blogging and it has changed my life. My friends live all over the world. In November 2020, we sold everything and retired to the mile-high desert of Prescott, AZ. We live less than five miles from the Granite Dells, four lakes, and hundreds of trails with our dog, Kalev, and two cats, Moji and Nutter Butter. Vince's sister came with us and lives close by. Every day is a new adventure.

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